Needing Normal

“Do you need anything?”

Crimson sat in silence. That question didn’t anger her like it used to, she knew those who asked did so out of concern. But she couldn’t make herself respond either. Do I need anything? I need my husband back. I need my life back, my future, my dreams. I need normal. She gives no voice to her thoughts.

“Crimson, can I bring you some food? I’ll make my lasagna. Okay? We’ll see you later, sweetheart. Love you.”

“Bye Mom.” That was all she could manage before hanging up the phone.

The knock on the door later barely registered. Her parents’ voices filtered through.

“Honey? It’s Mom and Dad.”

“Do you think she’ll answer?”

“I don’t know. Sometimes she does. Others. . . “

“Crimson, would you please let us know you’re in there?”

Her parents’ pleas broke through her fog and she opened the door.

Her father wrapped her in a bear-hug. “I’m so worried about you, honey. Look at me.”

He gently forced her face upwards.

“Crimson, we’ve been talking. I know it’s only been two months since David died, but we’re moving you home with us.”

“Temporarily. Just to give yourself time to sort things out.”

Her vacant eyes looked at her parents. She sat listless while her mother packed some of her clothes.

“Crimson, honey. I know you hurt, but you’ll get through this. I know you don’t feel like that now, but you will. Okay?”

She closed her eyes and didn't answer. People kept saying that, but she didn’t feel like she’d get through anything.